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I was too stressed out to enjoy my quiet vacation — until I changed my approach

Robin Madell   

I was too stressed out to enjoy my quiet vacation — until I changed my approach
  • Holly Andrews tried vacationing in Italy without taking PTO or informing her job.
  • Initially, she struggled with stress and guilt, leading to a change in her approach.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Holly Andrews, a 42-year-old finance firm managing director from Newport, United Kingdom. The following has been edited for length and clarity.

I'm a managing director at a fully hybrid finance firm, and I recently tried "quiet vacationing" for the first time.

I work full-time — around 40 hours a week. I work 50 hours if needed, and it can be 35 hours during quiet days. I usually try to start work around 8 a.m. and end around 5 p.m. or a bit later.

In April, I booked a 10-day trip to Bari, Italy, without taking any PTO or letting anyone at work know. Before going, I made sure that the hotel I'd booked had a good wifi connection so I could work from there, and I chose a 5:45 a.m. flight to arrive before the working day started in the UK where I live.

On the first day of my quiet vacation, I had great luck with the timing. Nobody caught me off guard with a random phone call at an inconvenient time. But, with every passing hour, I felt worse about the whole idea and couldn't relax. In the end, I had to change my approach.

When I landed in Italy, I pretended to work, logging in occasionally and checking emails

At first, I didn't have anything particular planned — no museum entrances or day trips booked — so I was mostly strolling around the lovely streets of Bari, sitting down for a coffee or gelato whenever I felt like it, or entering a museum when the mood struck me.

It was before the high season, so I didn't have to worry about queues or needing to make a reservation in advance.

I typically receive phone calls from work only when they are urgent, and we use email for things of lesser priority. Whenever I sat down for a coffee or ice cream, I'd check my email from my phone, and if someone from work called me or texted, it became my priority to respond to them instantly. But the guilt and stress of potentially getting a sudden call made it hard to enjoy the trip.

I couldn't relax and constantly worried about work interruptions

On the second day, I woke up early before the sun made it unbearably hot, visited some nearby places for a morning coffee and some pastry, and planned to go on a tour, grab an early lunch, and do some work in a restaurant or bistro.

The third day was the tipping point for me. I received an urgent work call while taking a tour of Bari Castle. The timing couldn't have been worse, as the call came when I was in the castle dungeons, and the cell signal was extremely weak.

When I realized what was happening, I went pale and quickly ran out to the courtyard to catch a stronger signal. Just then, a school tour entered the same courtyard, and the noise got so bad that I had to apologize and shout over the phone to be heard.

After that incident, I was so anxious about getting caught while quiet vacationing during work hours that I changed my approach.

I started working early in the morning during my quiet vacation

I started working around 7 a.m. local time and aimed to finish by 2 p.m. when I felt like Italians were just waking up to start their day. This was a game changer. I could finally relax and get to know the local culture without work hanging over my head.

I was putting in enough time to ensure my work was done properly and there were no problems. I often took quick breaks to go for a coffee or grab a pastry.

One day of the trip, at 1:30 p.m., my marketing manager called and said I'd have to change my part of a presentation ASAP. I picked up the phone and said that it wouldn't fit into my schedule and that I'd confront it first thing in the morning. It wasn't even a lie because my schedule for that afternoon was sunbathing and drinking Aperol.

My trip turned from a quiet vacation to a 'workcation'

If I counted the breaks I took, the five-and-a-half to six hours a day I spent working in Italy was much more productive than working for eight hours in depressing rainy England. I didn't take unnecessary breaks, and I didn't even think of reaching for my phone to scroll social media — something I wish I had the strength to do regularly.

My trip turned from quiet vacationing to a workcation with reduced working hours — but it was still very worth it. I felt much better mentally since I was no longer worried about letting anyone down.

This slight change in my approach still gave me what I needed — a change of surroundings and weather. Even though I spent a fair share of that time working, leaving the constant rain and going to Italy — where the sky was blue, the sun was shining, and the sea was warm enough to enjoy a swim — was a game changer.

I was full of joy and happiness.

I told my job I was in Italy

When I first went on my quiet vacation, I tried to keep it secret. Then I remembered that the work environment at my company is very employee-friendly, and it was better to admit to being abroad rather than pretend that wasn't happening. I disclosed that I was in Italy after a few days, but it was still a couple of working days until my return.

Everyone was very understanding of my new schedule. After that, I wasn't stressed at all and still had plenty of time during the day to enjoy my trip.

If you're taking a quiet vacation, plan your work schedule carefully

Ensure you have reliable internet and inform your team about your availability; finish your work tasks early; and, most importantly, make time to relax and enjoy the experience. It's not a real vacation if you're stressed out the whole time.

Next time, I'd go more toward a workcation rather than the approach I started with. The difference between sitting on a beach while constantly checking your phone and worrying about going in the water for more than five minutes — compared to doing what you want after shorter working hours completely relaxed — is astronomical.

It just feels so much better to do the work first and then enjoy your vacation to the maximum.

If you took a vacation during work and want to share your story, please email Tess Martinelli at tmartinelli@businessinsider.com.



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