Parental leave is the greatest benefit workers don't take

• The share of US workers who have access to family leave, including parental leave, is increasing.
• But the rate at which women take parental leave has stayed relatively flat. The rate for men is low.

It took Amanda Krupa having three kids to finally persuade herself to take her full maternity leave.

With the first two, Krupa worried about money — some of the leave was unpaid — and her career, so she took about half of the 12 weeks she was offered at the medical association where she worked.

"I didn't want people to think, 'Well, she's a mom now. She's not as committed to the job,'" Krupa said.

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By the time she had her third child, Krupa, who has written for Insider, felt financially and professionally secure enough to take the full amount. But when her newborn contracted a serious virus weeks after Krupa returned to work, she found herself in a bind: Krupa, now 38, was out of paid time off, so she had to take more leave and give up her paycheck.

Krupa's experiences illustrate the proverbial rock and hard place that many American mothers are caught between. Like many women, Krupa, who lives outside Chicago, took less time than she was allowed in order to protect her career and income. But when she took her full leave, caring for her family became harder.

The number of US workers whose employers offer parental leave is rising, but research has found that many women — and men — don't take all the time they're offered. Finances are a big factor, as are professional considerations. Research has found those who take leave are often penalized.

The pandemic exposed the pressures working parents in the US endured and highlighted how it benefited employers to support caregivers in their workforce. But the challenges that still exist suggest that too many employers essentially tell parents they're on their own.

The rate of women taking maternity leave hasn't changed since the '90s

The US is the only industrialized country that doesn't guarantee paid parental leave. On paper, things are getting better: A decade ago, 12% of the workforce had access to paid family leave, which includes parental leave, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Today, that figure is 25%. Meanwhile, the percentage of the workforce with access to unpaid family leave inched up to 90% this year.

But Jay Zagorsky of Boston University's Questrom School of Business found that the number of women taking maternity leave (paid and unpaid) between 1994 and 2015 remained relatively flat. While the rate of men taking paternity leave increased threefold during that time, the number is low. In 2015, about 10% of fathers took time off from work after a child arrived.

Zagorsky hasn't updated his study since 2017, but he and other experts said it's likely that the rate of women taking maternity leave remained about the same today.

"It's easy for companies to trumpet a generous policy and offer a benefit that so few workers actually take up," Zagorsky told Insider. "But the emperor has no clothes."

Money and career status might push people to cut short their leaves

There's little data on why people don't take leave, but it's likely that money is a big factor. Some employers offer short-term-disability insurance to help cover workers' parental leave, but it doesn't always replace all wages. Without paid leave, many employees simply can't afford to take time off work — especially at a time when their households' expenses are rising.

Brianna Leonhard, a 32-year-old special-education teacher in Georgia, cut her leave short by five weeks after she had her second baby. She left four weeks on the table after having her first baby. She delivered both children via scheduled cesarean section, an intense and typically expensive surgery.

Before her first birth, "we weren't sure what that medical bill was going to look like, and we didn't think that four weeks unpaid was a good idea," she said. (The bill ended up being thousands of dollars.)

Even in corporate America, paid leave isn't guaranteed. Research in 2020 found that only about 70% of Fortune 500 companies offered some form of paid leave for new parents. What's more, while federal law mandates that workers can't be fired for taking leave, they're entitled only to an "equivalent job" when they return.

Kids can be career killers for women. A vast body of research has found women with children are subject to the so-called motherhood penalty — they're less likely to be hired for jobs, to be perceived as competent, or to be paid as much as men who have the same qualifications.

Kate Weidner has firsthand experience. The first time she was pregnant, eight years ago, she was a director at a small Chicago ad agency and the first employee to have a child while working there.

Weidner cobbled together 12 weeks of paid leave, including some disability leave. But when she returned, her supervisors gave her fewer projects and were upset when she turned down client dinners because of her new baby, she said.

"I could tell that my employer saw me as less valuable," Weidner said.

Men face a special stigma that, in turn, hurts women

Studies have found that paternity leave has benefits for children, fathers, and families. There's some evidence that fathers are less likely to get divorced when they take leave following the birth of a child. And paternity leave is associated with better health and well-being for mothers, too.

But research also suggests that many working fathers do not take the full amount of leave they're offered — and that those who take it can face a special stigma.

This happened to a manager at a midsize California healthtech company this year when he returned to work after taking 12 weeks of parental leave, which were partially paid. The manager, who requested anonymity, said colleagues commented that it was unusual for a man to be out for so many weeks after having a child.

Paternity leave is also critical to women's success at work, Cathy Tinsley, a professor at Georgetown University who researches gender dynamics in corporations, said. When men take little or no leave, mothers often become the primary caregivers, which research suggests hurts their careers.

"The signal it sends is that caregiving is women's work," she said.

So what needs to happen for more parents to take leave? Federally mandated, fully paid leave would be a start, as would company policies that help parents balance jobs and responsibilities at home.

Shortly after returning to work, Weidner, the ad exec, left to start her own firm. Today, all employees there are eligible for 16 weeks of paid parental leave. She also offers flexible hours.

"It's not just about the parental-leave program," Weidner, a mother of three, said. "It's also the support and the culture for working parents."