Psychologists recommend women take these 4 steps to get comfortable with the word 'ambitious' and take charge of their career

• Women's History Month is an important time to reflect on the factors holding women back from success.
• A recent poll of 3,000 women found that most women identify as ambitious when it comes to their careers, but only about one third are comfortable using the word "ambitious" to describe themselves.
• According to psychologists, many women are reluctant to use that word to describe themselves out of fear of being seen as too aggressive.
• But there are a few steps women can take to become more comfortable speaking about their ambition, such as changing their inner narrative to be kinder and more positive toward themselves.
• Visit Business Insider's homepage for more stories.

Women are ambitious at work, but many are reluctant to admit it.

That's according to a recent global survey of 3,000 women by American Express and The New York Women's Foundation, a non profit that promotes gender equality and fair treatment for women. Some 59% of the women who participated in the poll, said that having ambition is an important trait to have to succeed in one's career; and more than 50% said they identify as ambitious.

But the percentage of women who said they were comfortable actually calling themselves or being labeled ambitious was much lower. Less than one third of all women said they're proud identifying with the label, the report revealed. Instead, women were more comfortable identifying with the word "motivated," the survey found.

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Merriam Webster defines "motivated" as "having an incentive or a strong desire to do well or succeed in some pursuit." The word "ambitious" has more at stake. It's defined as "having a desire to be successful, powerful, or famous."

Avoiding the word "ambitious" may be an effort by women to make sure they aren't perceived as too aggressive, according to Margot Levin, a clinical psychologist in New York City.

That's part of the "likeability trap," or the double standards society has for men and women in the workplace, and the increased importance of women being perceived as likeable to get ahead.

"Women have long gotten the message from society that they should be modest and more self-effacing than men. In addition, there is research that shows that while men are rewarded in the workplace for being ambitious, women can be penalized and viewed as aggressive," Levin said.

Indeed, women in leadership positions are more likely to be disliked by their peers and subordinates, 2012 research published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology shows. And women who negotiate as hard as men do tend to be labeled aggressive or demanding, 2005 Harvard University research shows.

As author Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie said in her viral 2017 TEDx talk - which Beyoncé later sampled in her hit song "Flawless" - "We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We say to girls, 'You can have ambition, but not too much.'"

Denise Pickett, American Express president of global services group, said there are potential long-term effects for women who avoid aligning themselves with their ambitions.

"Ambition is intrinsically tied to confidence - not just in ourselves - but in our ability to be recognized for our contributions and, ultimately, find the resources we need to achieve our goals," Pickett told Business Insider. "By openly articulating our ambitions, and the barriers we may face in achieving them, we can find the right advocates to help us overcome these challenges."

To be sure, shying away from the word "ambitious" is certainly not the only, or main thing holding women back. Lack of representation in the C-suite, unconscious bias in hiring and performance reviews, harassment, and a boys' club mentality are some big factors, to name a few. But shirking the word does have an impact.

"It puts women at a disadvantage if they feel they can't be open about being ambitious the same way that men can. Ambition is motivating; it is about setting goals for yourself, creating things, accomplishing things," Levin said.

To get more comfortable with the A-word, there are a few things women can start doing today, according to psychologists.

Know you're not alone if you shy away from the word "ambition."

It helps to know that others grapple with this, Levin said. Educating yourself on the double standards there are for men and women in the workplace can make you feel more empowered to advocate for yourself and go for your goals, Levin said.

Start changing the narrative you tell yourself.

"We are all much more encouraging with other people than we are with ourselves, and we're more confident in other people's abilities than we are on our own. So I encourage people to speak to themselves as they would to a friend," she said. "You would never tell a friend that they're not good enough, or their ideas aren't good."

Write down your accomplishments in a daily journal.

It's important to be your own cheerleader, according to licensed clinical psychologist Annette Conway.

"The last thing before going to sleep, mentally list the good things that happened that day. The next morning, you have a better chance of waking up on the right side of the bed, because you won't be leaving yourself in a negative mood when night comes, as you might have done in the past," she said.

Recognize that you are ambitious, and go after your goals.

Acknowledge your ambition and drive, and then start planning actionable steps to achieving those goals, Levin said. Lastly, don't be afraid to tell others about your ambitions.