It's time to reframe exercise and stop thinking of it as punishment

• We need to stop thinking of exercise as punishment for eating (or anything else).
• The damaging association begins in childhood, with misbehaving pupils often forced to run laps.
• Shift your focus from how many calories you've burned to how movement makes you feel.

"I ate so much last night, better hit the treadmill today!" "I only exercise so I can eat more." "I did a HIIT class this morning so I'll have a cookie this afternoon."

Such common things to say, but so, so wrong.

The notion that exercise should be punishment - for eating or anything else - is widespread in society and has been ingrained in many of us from childhood. But if we really want to create healthy relationships with movement, food, and our bodies, we have to break down this damaging idea and change our mindsets.

It doesn't happen overnight, but it's entirely possible - trust me, I did it.

The idea of exercise as punishment begins in childhood

Recently, footage emerged on social media of tourists in Bali being punished for not wearing masks by doing push-ups. Yes, push-ups are challenging (which I discovered all too well when I did 10,000 of them), but physical activity as penance is never going to help people enjoy movement.

The problem begins in childhood - in many schools, it's common for lateness or misbehaving to result in laps around the football field. But this helps ingrain the notion that running is unpleasant and something to dread.

Dr. Lisa Lewis, a licensed psychologist, told Insider that this mindset is hard to shake as adults: "Once a behavior has been used and learned as punishment, it's difficult to unlearn. If someone grew up needing to run suicides for not working hard enough at basketball practice, they may always associate running as a bad thing."

Working out to 'earn' or 'burn' food is unhealthy

Personal trainer Luke Worthington told Insider he often gets messages from clients saying things like, "I've just had a big Sunday dinner, I need to book a session in for tomorrow," but this is absolutely not the approach to take, whether you're trying to manage your weight or not.

"It's the idea that exercise is something you've got to do, but you don't really want to, or it's your punishment for having enjoyed something," he said.

While it's true that to lose weight you need to be in a calorie deficit, expending more energy than you're consuming, the role of formal exercise in this is wildly overestimated by most people.

In fact, workouts only make up about 5-10% of the average person's total daily calorie expenditure. The rest is used up by the body to simply keep functioning, and through NEAT (non-exercise activity thermogenesis, which means all the movement you do over the course of the day, such as walking upstairs).

"It's really hard to train to get yourself into a calorie deficit," Worthington said. "It's almost impossible."

You don't need to exercise aggressively before or after eating a more energy-dense meal, and thinking that you do is a really unhealthy mindset to hold. The fact of the matter is that if you're in a calorie deficit six days of the week, that Friday night takeout isn't going to make a huge difference.

Read more: Labeling foods with the amount of exercise needed to burn off the calories sends a terrible message about both eating and exercising

There's also the fact that calorie-counters on fitness trackers are notoriously inaccurate. "If you're thinking you've burned 350 calories so that makes up for the starter you ate last night, it doesn't work like that, there are far too many other variables," Worthington said.

Enjoying all your favorite foods in moderation is really important for the sustainability of your diet and lifestyle (I know, because I did so on my own weight loss journey), and doing so does not require a side of guilt or any requirement to "balance it out" with 20,000 burpees.

Gyms and fitness professionals have a role to play in changing the narrative

The culture in certain parts of the fitness industry doesn't help, with some trainers talking about "smashing" their clients and people then feeling guilty if they don't finish a workout feeling annihilated.

Worthington points out that big fitness studios have a part to play too, citing Barry's Bootcamp's famous "Hell Week" (which involves seven of the intense hour-long workouts in seven days) as an example.

"It's irresponsible," he said. "They're tapping into what they think will be popular and feeding the b*******."

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Barry's Bootcamp did not immediately respond to Insider's request for comment on Hell Week.

Lewis added: "Creating an environment in which the individual views exercise as punishment, instead of as medicine, is flat out wrong. Instead of using exercise as punishment, we - whether we are coaches working with athletes, or individuals working on ourselves - should find forms of movement that make us happy, engaged, and feeling efficacious."

She continued: "If you can shape a positive association with your physical activities, you will enjoy them more, which means you are more likely to do them, and to try hard while you are doing them."

Punishment is an ineffective way to change behavior

When exercise is considered punishment, you're going to struggle to create a healthy relationship with your body (and, likely, food too).

"People think exercise should be hard and you should hate it, it's to be feared, and if you don't end up needing to puke in a bucket in a corner, you've failed," Worthington said.

This couldn't be further from the truth, and it puts a lot of people off even starting. Almost 14 million adults in England didn't exercise for half an hour a week between March and May 2020 and activity levels fell drastically during the pandemic, according to Sport England, reported by the Guardian.

The fact of the matter is that gentle movement and short workouts - just getting the blood flowing, the heart rate elevated, and the endorphins pumping - can be plenty.

Movement should be a reward for the mind and body

I now always think of exercise as treatment for the mind as much as the body, so if I'm not in the right headspace for a workout, I skip it.

"I cannot emphasize enough how fabulous exercise is - yes, for your body, but even more so for your mind," Lewis said. "Exercise makes you less depressed, less anxious, less stressed, more attentive, and more energetic. It increases your sex drive, your metabolism, and your ability to learn and consolidate new memories. Everyone should not only have regular habits of physical activity in their lives, but they should look forward to and enjoy that activity."

Some people say they just don't like exercise, and as much as I preach the myriad benefits of movement now, I get it, because I used to think the same.

A post shared by Rachel Hosie (@rachel_hosie)

The truth, however, was that I simply hadn't found the forms of movement I truly loved (weight-lifting was a revelation) and was forcing myself to do things I hated (steady state cardio) because I thought I was meant to and I thought I had to, to counteract eating.

Now, I don't force myself to go on runs, because I do not like running. I very rarely do HIIT, because I don't enjoy it. Movement is no longer punishment, because I only do the things I actively enjoy doing.

Read more: The HIIT myth: Why we've been sold a lie about high intensity interval training, and what you should be doing instead

"Moving your body should be something to be cherished and enjoyed, a form of play like it is for children and animals," Worthington said. "It should be seen as a form of self-care, not penance."

Instead of qualifying your workouts by how many calories you burned, focus on how you felt before or after and how you performed. Set yourself performance-based goals to work towards, which give you a real sense of achievement - maybe that's running 5K in half an hour, nailing a forearm headstand, or achieving a full push-up.

We were designed to move, it's meant to feel good, you just need to find what's right for you. Stop worrying about the calories burned in your workout and focus on what makes you feel strong, empowered, and awesome - that very feeling is why I love working out so much.