A Florida woman got a dishwashing job at her husband's assisted-living facility so she could see him during the pandemic

• Prior to the coronavirus pandemic, Mary Daniel visited her husband, Steve, who has Alzheimer's, every day at his assisted-living facility in Jacksonville, Florida.
• After Florida issued an order banning visitors from nursing homes and assisted-living facilities in March, Daniel immediately contacted the facility asking if there was any way she could work there.
• Two weeks ago, Daniel accepted a dishwashing job at the care home. She had her first shift on July 3 and was able to see him properly for the first time in 114 days.
• "When I opened the door to his room and he saw me, even with my mask, he actually said 'Mary' and we hugged and we both cried," Daniel told Insider.

A woman who was unable to visit her husband, who has Alzheimer's, at his assisted-living facility due to the coronavirus came up with an ingenious way to see him — she got a dishwashing job there.

Mary Daniel's husband, Steve, was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's in 2013 and has lived at Rosecastle at Deerwood, an assisted-living facility in Jacksonville, Florida, since last July.

Prior to the coronavirus pandemic, Daniel visited her husband every day. She sat with him while he ate dinner, helped him get ready for bed, and they watched TV together each night.

"It was a really nice way for both of us to end the day," she told Insider.

However, after a state order barring visitors from nursing homes and assisted-living facilities was announced in March, she was no longer able to see him. Daniel contacted the facility and asked if there was any way she could work there, either through volunteering or taking a job. The facility initially told her to wait, and for 114 days, she was unable to see her husband in person.

"My husband was 5 miles away from me, but he was basically gone," Daniel said.

Steve Daniel wasn't able to understand why his wife was no longer with him, and it caused him great distress

Steve Daniel's Alzheimer's makes it difficult to communicate, especially over the phone, and though Mary Daniel tried visiting him through a window, "he cried both times," she said. In fact, during their time apart, he lost more than 10 pounds, Daniel said.

She decided on Father's Day that she couldn't put him through the stress of any further window visits.

"Especially with dementia patients, it's a matter of contact, it's touching, being with them where they feel your presence and they feel your love, versus it being a verbal thing. He can't talk to me about his day or the frustrations, but we can feel each other and be there for each other just by simply being beside each other," she said.

Two weeks ago, Mary Daniel got a call from the facility's corporate office offering her a part-time dishwashing job

She accepted the position, and she said she takes it very seriously. "I mean it when I say I want to be the best dishwasher they've ever had. I want to do the job, and I want the other staff to know I'm serious about this," she said.

The job is like any other dishwashing job, and she had to undergo the same training and tests as any other employee would.

"I had to do a fingerprint background test, a COVID test, a drug test, a TB test, and then I had to do 20 hours of video training on food handling, COVID precautions, hazardous waste disposal, AIDS education, and Alzheimer's education," she told Insider.

Kelley Withrow, executive director for Rosecastle at Deerwood, said in a statement, "Mary has been a part of our Deerwood family since her husband, Steve, moved into our community, but we are proud to welcome her onto our team."

When Daniel took her first shift on July 3, her husband recognized her, even with her mask on

"He's not able to understand that I'm a dishwasher and he can't grasp what's happened, but he understands that I'm there. I've been in four times, and I can tell immediately that there's a change in his demeanor and his anxiety level," she said.

Daniel added that since her husband's disease is degenerative, she has to take advantage of the time she has left. "He knows me now, this is the time I have to get to him; he may not know me three months from now, and this time would be gone," she said.

Daniel is working to help other families who are unable to visit their loved ones in care facilities

Daniel has created a Facebook group called Caregivers for Compromise that has over 3,000 members. Her mission is to change state policies to allow for some type of visitation. She and others in the group are preparing a statement that will focus on things like outdoor visits. "We want smart, step-by-step ways for us to get back to our families," she said.

She has also tried to contact Governor Ron DeSantis "hundreds of times" on social media, but said she has not heard from him. DeSantis recently announced that the order barring visitors from nursing homes would be extended for another 60 days.

"I know they are being isolated so that they are being safe, but the isolation is going to kill them from loneliness," she said.

• Read more:
• In an effort to curb the spread of the coronavirus in nursing homes, Connecticut has taken an unlikely approach of opening a COVID-19 only nursing home
• A grandmother in isolation at a care facility got to see her granddaughter on her wedding day through a window
• A care home created a plastic 'happiness bubble' to let residents safely see and touch their family again