India’s Emerging Alpha Male Is Courteous, Equal Partner

Open papers in the morning with your cuppa and what do you get to see? Rapes, murders, crimes against women, domestic abuse, marital violence etc. However, there is something that escapes the headlines – the emergence of a new Indian male who thinks sharing responsibilities with his spouse isn’t something out of the ordinary. It isn’t cool or something; it’s just natural and normal to be so.

And guess what, the ad world seems to be catching up on this image pretty well. Ads, in fact, are the reflection of everything we see around us. Sometimes, they even pack fantasies so well that they tempt people to emulate them in their lives. Do you remember the Google ad of friends across boundaries brought together by grandchildren over jhajhariyas? Now, that is certainly a super nice thing to do to one’s grandparents!

The recent talk in the town is about the new male who has come into emergence with the Airtel advertisement. The man in question is suave, hardworking, respectful and finally, a husband who gets his share of affection from his wife.

In turn, the wife is a matter-of-factly boss with a bit of hesitant apology thrown in. Her voice doesn’t quiver at the time when she prods her colleagues to work late, to meet a rather impossible deadline. She is a metrosexual woman. At office, she is dressed in a crisp saree and at home, you will see her cooking up delicious meals in the shortest of shorts, using super-seductive cookware. Then she purrs around to get her man’s attention and get him to come home for dinner.

When you look at this ad, there is something that strikes about this. The topic and execution has sure got most people thinking and responding to this ad. To that extent, the advertisement has been successful. It has a ‘talking point’ whether you agree with what’s shown or not.

The woman’s role has been much discussed about since she is shown as balancing both the acts – a commanding boss in the office and a totally domesticated woman who will endorse the stereotypes to come home and cook according to her husband’s preference.

But there is something that they are clearly ignoring when they speak of the woman being progressive or regressive. It is about the emergence of the neo-Indian male who can be both a subordinate at office and a doting husband who likes home-cooked food. And he does not mind staying back late in the office at his woman boss’s behest.

How and when did this happen? And how did we miss the signs all over? The neo-Indian male emerged without as much as anyone noticing it?

In the country where rapes are about the sick mindset of feudal and sexist perceptions, there are millions of homes in cities and villages, too, where men stand to shoulder the responsibilities of their wives.

It is no more a matter of ego or turning subservient when one does this. It is simply a way of making way for the new order to take shape. Men, today, are much more sensible than their earlier generation who were oblivious to the facts such as menstruation, menopause, pre-menstrual syndromes, ovulation and a host of other things that can trouble only a bleeding woman.

In the changed world, men do not hesitate to wash dishes, bathe kids, cook and clean while the wife is on an assignment in another country, or has a demanding job.

This transformation has not been easy. Changed economic conditions and buying power has vested equal power in the hands of both men and women. But women, who historically had less negotiating power, have emerged confident winners of equal space in the society.

This transformation happened despite the marital ads remaining unchanged. Well, people still look for ‘beautiful, tall, fair, slim, family-loving girl’ for a boy who is possibly earning in lakhs. And none of the attributes will change even if she, too, is earning in lakhs!

The transformation has silently happened in homes and offices, where men have simply come around to change the pecking order. So it’s little surprise that a woman is a husband’s boss in the office and a caring wife at home. In fact, putting a man in power position in this ad would have sent a wrong message to the society that women are being forced to overwork while a man gets to leave office early. A meal prepared by him may be damned!

Raising a toast to the new Indian male isn’t only gracious; it is the most important thing to do. That way, grace remains intact.
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