Chinese parents have great expectations for their children's achievement
"Parents can't always tell kids what to do, right?" my son asked recently asked me. We were discussing our favorite short films after returning from the New York International Children's Film Festival.
"I can now, but who knows in 10 years?" I said to myself.
Confucian culture emphasizes one's importance to the family, society, and other people, so Chinese parents often project their hopes and decisions onto the next generation. Almost every child growing up in a Chinese family heard their parents say, "I do it all for you!"
Recently I came across a tragic story of an immigrant family that puts a spotlight on this traditional Chinese parent-child relationship.
Paul Li told his son Calvin that he would never be a professional football player because he was Chinese, and asked him to focus on his studies instead. Calvin died in a car crash just before he was about to start college.
"Even though I know maybe in reality he would not be a football player. But it was just the way I shattered his dream when he was small ... and I know for sure, there are other Chinese parents who are doing the same to their children right now. And I don't want that to happen," Li said.