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Dear America, return these three valuables to India, please

Dear America, return these three valuables to India, please


German chancellor Angela Merkel made everyone’s (including Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s) day when she returned a 10th century Durga idol which was stolen from Kashmir over two decades back.

Three years ago, it was found that the idol was spotted in a museum in Sruttgart, Germany and the Indian government immediately got in touch with the Germany authorities to ensure that the process of getting the idol back was started.

And, finally, Angela Merkel herself returned the idol to Modi on Tuesday during her two-day visit to India.

Thanking Merkel and the people of Germany for returning the idol, Modi was quoted saying, “The statue is from Jammu and Kashmir & is a symbol of victory of good over evil.”

We at Business Insider got a little carried away by Merkel’s benevolence and thought to ourselves, ‘Hey, what if we had a chance to present our wishlist of Indian valuables we would like America to return to us?'

We let that idea linger and racked our brains for a long long time and came up with this list of three valuables that definitely need a homecoming.

1. Priyanka Chopra’s accent: As much as we are proud of Priyanka Chopra bagging the lead role in Quantico, an American TV series, we cannot help but roll our eyes and cover our ears whenever she starts speaking in the show, mainly because we’re clueless as to which accent she has put on, considering the first episode revealed she’s capable of putting on atleast five different accents.
So, consider this as a genuine request America, return her accent(s) to us, so that we can do the needful and lock it up in a closet which no can find or hear.

2. Sunder Pichai: Okay, there’s no easy way to say this, but India is brimming with engineering graduates who’ve slogged their asses and survived four years at a place worse than jail- engineering college. If that doesn’t sound bad enough, this will- they do so, without having a social life or girlfriends. Thus, the least we can ask for from Silicon Valley is to return our very own Sunder Pichai to us, so he can start something In India and hire the hundreds of jobless engineers. They’ve sacrificed enough.

3. Kunal Nayyar: India has had enough of Kapil Sharma on one hand, and of AIB, on the other. We need someone who can spearhead an intelligent but subtle brand of funny to make sense of all the bizarre things happening in our country, and who better than Raj Kuthrapalli to do just that? Our apologies, cast of The Big Bang Theory, but we’d like it if our funny boy is returned to us. And, yes his accent is real.

Image credit: Indiatimes

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