What did I learn?
Let's get this out of the way: don't eat like Warren Buffett unless you are Warren Buffett.
The man himself says to be yourself instead of copying him. This applies not only to investing, but to diet as well.
My own experience was miserable and I realized why I committed myself to eating healthy when I moved to New York. Being sluggish and moody during the day just isn't fun.
Second, it's also a good lesson in recognizing limits. Buffett apparently has none, I very much do.
And finally, I now understand Buffett's investing strategy perfectly!
Just kidding.
I just have a few extra pounds to work off and a good story.
Average Calories per day: 4,107.4
Total calories for 5 days: 20,537
Weight Gain Monday AM to Saturday AM: 2.4 lbs
Weight Gain Monday PM to Friday PM: 4 lbs
The final tallies for dinner were, in a word: monumental.
Honestly, I wasn't even drunk from the wine but the meal knocked me out. I was struggling to form coherent thoughts as all the blood ran from my brain to my stomach, attempting to handle the vast influx of fat, protein, and sugar.
My coworkers and I ambled towards Grand Central Station and I felt dazed. We decided against a post-dinner drink and wandering off from the rest of the group, I felt unsure on my feet.
I huffed and puffed my way back to my apartment near Chinatown, sweating pure steak grease.
Upon making it back, I collapsed on the ground of my living room. I actually dozed off for a little over an hour, lying on the floor trying to pretend my stomach wasn't bursting at the seams.
Dinner, Day 5: Seafood bouquet, 32 ounce Colorado Ribeye steak, hash browns, creamed spinach, coconut cake from Smith & Wollensky. Red wine and water
Dinner Calories: 3,343
Total calories: 6,513
Friday PM weight: 175.2 lbs
Next, the steak, a 32-ounce Colorado Ribeye.
In what can only be compared to the primitive tomahawk of a caveman, the mighty Colorado Ribeye emerged on a plate still sizzling. At that point a glorious, freeing sense of debauchery overtook me and I laid all of the terrible meals of the last week to the side.
The steak was a knockout.
For the first three-quarters of a pound, I consumed it with reckless abandon, ignoring the inevitable food hangover that was surely coming. The Ribeye was cooked to perfection, cut beautifully, and contained just the right amount of fat.
When I hit the wall — and I hit it hard — there was an overriding sense of disappointment that I simply couldn't finish the meal.
I asked our waiter Baci, who had served Buffett on a trip to NYC in August, to bring me what the man himself ate. This was a mistake.
First, we started with something off menu called the seafood bouquet. It featured lobster, shrimp, and lump crab meat. The seafood was truly divine, though it was chilled and I typically enjoy seafood hot.
I began to feel a bit of unease as I dined on the appetizer, thinking back to everything I put down that day and week. I wanted to have an authentic meal at a favorite location of Buffett's, but could I survive to the end?
Also, I must admit here that I broke the Buffett rules by having a bit of wine. But, it was the end of the week and can you really blame me?
For dinner, I went with a few coworkers to Smith and Wollensky, Buffett's favorite New York City restaurant.
Buffett dines here once a year for a dinner in which a lucky bidder can dine with the Oracle of Omaha himself.
In 2016, the meal went for $3.4 million. All of the proceeds are given to charity.
I was joined by four of my coworkers to bask in the final meal of my epic run.
I contacted the restaurant earlier in the week, letting them know what we were there for, and they did everything to make my experience as authentic as possible.
We sat in the private alcove where Buffett sits when he visits, with a full glass wall looking into the kitchen. There was a plaque with Buffett's name on it and a letter from the man himself framed on the wall.
Here is all of the Cherry Coke I consumed during the week.
The sugar and caffeine crash came easier by Friday. I learned how to manage the timing and frequency of the Coke intake to make sure that I had a solid energy reserve all day.
But I still felt awful after I finished a bottle.
Here's some fun math on the amount of Cherry Coke I consumed in the week.
- Total amount: 338 fluid ounces, or 2.64 gallons
- Calories: 4,500
- Sugar: 1,260 grams, or 2.78 pounds
- Caffeine: 1,020 milligrams, or 204 a day (an average cup of coffee, 8 fluid ounces, has 95-165 milligrams)
What if Buffett just says he eats all of this food to make other people like me buy it and boost his investments' sales?
Buffett owns DQ and holds considerable stock in McDonald's and Coca Cola. Sitting down for my final lunch I realized that I probably made the guy a lot of money that week.
The thought struck me mid-bite of M&Ms Blizzard: I was a sucker.
Buffett is a self-mythologizer, a folk hero who presents himself as a kind grandfather but has made it in the vicious investment world. He's a ball of contradictions and social oddities.
I couldn't put it past him to deceive the few interviewers he trusts in order to cast the glow of the cult of Buffett.
On the other hand, people see him at these restaurants, surely. He wouldn't lie about his diet just to get a few suckers and worshippers to boost his sales, would he?
Lunch, Day 5: Dairy Queen chili cheese dog and fries with an M&M Blizzard, Cherry Coke.
Lunch calories: 1,400
Of course, Warren Buffett eats ice cream for breakfast. Of course, I was the idiot who saved it for the last day.
Remember what I said about getting used to it? Not so much on Friday morning.
I have never enjoyed ice cream less. That's really all I have to say about this meal.
Breakfast, Day 5: Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream, Cherry Coke.
Breakfast Calories: 870
Friday AM Weight: 170.4 lbs
Buffett once ordered a country (or chicken) fried steak with Jay Z, so I had to get it for a meal.
I really like country fried steak (see my previous comment about being from the South). This one was from Cowgirl in the West Village.
Buffett isn't a big fan of broccoli, much less collard greens, so I did cheat a bit. But, c'mon, actual collard greens at a restaurant in the North? I had to try them.
Alas, they were bad.
I went with a coworker and couldn't finish the steak and mashed potatoes (not to worry, salt was added in extreme amounts), prompting her to call me "weak." I replied I would take the leftovers home and finish them later (we were eating fairly early), but happen to "forget" the bag as I left.
In a surprise to probably no one, the gravy really sat heavy in my stomach. Walking to the subway I was happy that there was only one day left, but I felt terrible.
Dinner, Day 4: Country fried steak with mashed potatoes, gravy, and Collard greens from Cowgirl, water.
Dinner Calories: 1,540
Total calories: 3,484
Wednesday PM weight: 172.4 lbs
I was running out of idea at this point on Thursday, and honestly I was busy with work, so I just gave up and got McDonald's.
Fun fact, Buffett once bought Bill Gates lunch at McDonald's using coupons.
Oh, another reason why this was such a terrible idea. I cover policy here at Business Insider, including healthcare and taxes. Of course, I decided to try out the Buffett diet on the week that Republicans attempted another repeal of Obamacare (no, the irony did not escape me) and rolled out their most detailed framework for tax reform yet.
This meant that in the midst of my midafternoon sugar crash, I was typically forced to pull myself out of the fog and right something of substance.
To be fair to myself, I did write a considerable amount over the five days. You'd have to ask my editor Brett if my diet hurt the quality of my writing, but I stand by everything I published.
Lunch, Day 4: McDonald's Quarter Pounder with cheese, french fries, Cherry Coke.
Lunch calories: 870
This may be the point to mention that I've done terrible things to my body before, and this was still the worst.
I'm no stranger to massive dietary changes, I gained 80 pounds in college and then lost 45 pounds in three to four months after I graduated (I overestimated my pay as an intern and underestimated NYC rents). That is to say, I've done some terrible things to my body via my diet before.
That is to say, I've done some terrible things to my body via my diet before.
Even at my heaviest, I never felt this run down. The weird thing though was that I was still hungry at every meal.
Maybe it was the chemicals from the processed food?
Futures were down, so I ordered two sausage patties for breakfast, but upon arriving at work, I realized the McDonald's workers only gave me one.
I'm still not sure if the single patty was a good or a bad thing, but it did give me a bit of a break from heavy meals.
Also, it made me realize that McDonald's sausage by itself is not very good. Who could've guessed?
Breakfast, Day 4: McDonald's Sausage patty, Cherry Coke.
Breakfast Calories: 174
Thursday AM Weight: 169.8 lbs
Dinner on Wednesday was veal parmigiana with my own indulgence, a Hawaiian Punch. I can't prove that Buffett likes fruit punch, but hey, it was my favorite when I was six.
I actually walked home on Wednesday, and then went for a run.
I felt as if the sugar, syrup, and grease leaked from my belly to my legs. Children were passing me on the street during my walk home, and I'm usually a fast walker. Imagine having maple syrup in your joints and muscles, and that's what I felt like.
Dinner, Day 3: Veal parmigiana from Nonna's LES Pizzeria. Water.
Dinner Calories: 1,060
Total calories: 3,310
Wednesday PM weight: 172.4 lbs
For lunch, I went back and found one of Buffett's go-to lunch orders at Omaha institution Goart's.
I ordered an open-faced turkey sandwich with bacon and Thousand Island dressing from the local sandwich shop Eisenberg's.
They served me a closed-faced, sliced turkey sandwich with bacon and Thousand Island dressing. I wasn't going to split hairs, so I took it back to the office as it was.
The meal was finished off by fries and some Cherry Coke.
"Oh, Bob, did you put extra salt on the fries like you said Buffett always does?" you may ask.
My answer? Yes, I did. Hope you're enjoying my suffering so far.
Lunch, Day 3: Turkey sandwich with bacon and Thousand Island dressing from Eisenberg's Sandwich Shop. French fries, Cherry Coke.
Lunch calories: ~900
Another day, another bacon, egg, and cheese.
Honestly, given the recent rise in the stock market, Buffett must be getting sick of these biscuits by now.
I decided to try and space out the Cokes more evenly to avoid the crashes (spoiler: it didn't work).
Breakfast, Day 3: McDonald's Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit, Cherry Coke.
Breakfast Calories: 450
Tuesday AM Weight: 169.2 lbs
Tuesday night might have been my low point, as evidenced by my sad dinner spread.
In the middle of my run that evening I texted a coworker expressing my dismay at my physical state. I was going noticeably slower than the day before, and couldn't make myself run faster. My legs simply wouldn't move like I wanted them to.
Upon getting back to my apartment from the run I was, as my notes say, "**WRECKED**" by stomach cramps. My roommate walked in as I was sitting on our couch doubled over and asked me if I was sure I wanted to keep going.
I finally got myself together, and, unable to muster the strength to figure out a proper meal I just made two hot dogs that I had and ate some Utz chips — another brand that Buffett owns.
I went to bed Tuesday night feeling much less enthused about the prospects for the rest of the week.
Dinner, Day 2: Two Hebrew National Kosher Hot Dogs, Utz Kettle Chips, See's Candies peanut brittle
Dinner calories: ~650
Total calories: 3,710
Tuesday PM weight: 171.0 lbs
By Tuesday afternoon, I was... not feeling good.
Dear God, did I make a mistake.
Again, I attempted to frontload the Coke and by 2 p.m. I was more than two-thirds of the way done with the two-liter. Not only that, but the heavy meal —especially the milkshake — was crushing my will to live.
I was jittery, grumpy, exhausted, unfocused, and downright distraught. The sugar from the Coke (roughly a half pound a day) was causing surges and drop-offs in energy.
The increase in meat consumption was making me sweat more than normal (weirdly enough from my kneecaps of all places). The bloating was making my back hurt. I was a wreck after less than 48 hours.
For lunch I went for a burger, another Buffett favorite.
Now many of my coworkers said I cheated by going with Shake Shack instead of some local restaurant, but you know what? I was the one suffering, I deserved a slight luxury.
Another signature Buffett trait is an excess of salt, as former Wells Fargo CEO John Stumpf once described.
"When the food comes, Warren grabs a salt shaker in his left hand and one in his right, and it's a snowstorm," Stumpf told Bloomberg in 2014.
So I threw a little extra sodium on the french fries before dipping them in the chocolate shake.
Breakfast, Day 2: Shake Shack ShackBurger, french fries, chocolate milkshake. Cherry Coke.
Lunch calories: 1,710
The second day started much better.
I lost sleep on Sunday night worrying about the challenge ahead, but after feeling decent at the end of the day, I got a good night's sleep.
Stock futures were up on Tuesday, so I decided it would be fair to get a bacon. egg, and cheese biscuit. Coming from the South, this was my preferred option over the semi-soggy McMuffin from the day before and I felt confident as I tucked into breakfast and the second giant bottle of Cherry Coke.
Breakfast, Day 2: McDonald's Bacon, Egg, and Cheese Biscuit. Cherry Coke.
Breakfast Calories: 450
Tuesday AM Weight: 170.4 lbs
I cheated a bit on dinner for the evening, getting chicken parmigiana. Which Buffett usually has as a side (!).
By the evening I was feeling a bit better, possibly because I finished the coke around 2 p.m.
Thr big test was running. I typically try to run four to five miles a day after work, and I was dreading how I would feel. I imagined keeling over and puking into the East River. To my surprise, it was fine. I was probably a step slower than normal, but I didn't feel too awful.
Dinner was heavy — I couldn't finish the whole serving — but at the end of day one I was doing half decent.
Dinner, Day 1: Chicken parmigiana with penne from Famous Calabria Pizza
Dinner calories: ~1,500
Total calories: 3,520
Monday PM weight: 171.2 lbs
My inner child was excited to have ice cream in the middle of the day. The chili cheese dog excited me less.
The bun on the DQ dog was spongy, but not like an angel food cake. Like an actual kitchen sponge. The hot dog tasted very salty.
The sundae was delightful, Buffett says he typically gets cherry syrup on his DQ sundaes which was not an option at my Manhattan location. I did get his preferred chopped nuts on top.
I was feeling pretty weighed down at this point. I don't have a big lunch most days, a salad at most, so the extra calories and copious sugar made me feel bloated.
Lunch, Day 1: Dairy Queen chili cheese dog, strawberry sundae with chopped nuts, Cherry Coke.
Lunch calories: 650
The Cherry Coke hit me like a ton of bricks.
I don't drink much soda — I drink mostly water and coffee at work — so the sudden increase in the amount of corn syrup in my diet made me feel incredibly sluggish. Plus, the sugar high was off the charts, I almost felt the tingle of the carbonation in my fingers as I was typing.
Then again, I also put down half the two liter before 11 a.m. in an attempt to front load the caffeine.
On the first breakfast of the week I was nervous but had a supply of foolish confidence in my ability to handle what was ahead.
In the HBO documentary "Becoming Warren Buffett," the legendary investor said that his breakfast each day comes from McDonald's and is dictated by the stock market.
Typically, Buffett gets breakfast once the market is open. If stocks are up, he gets a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. If they're down, he opts for a cheaper breakfast of two sausage patties. If the market is flat, as it was Monday morning before the open, he goes for the sausage McMuffin.
I get to work at around 7:30 a.m. ET every day, meaning that I had to base my McDonald's selection on the pre-market futures which tend to be a bit harder to gauge. Regardless, I decided to try and factor in a bit of qualitative analysis based on the overseas markets and the previous days' close (and, by the end of the week, what I could tolerate).
Putting aside my methodology, the first breakfast wasn't too challenging. The biggest issue was the lack of coffee, as Buffett doesn't drink the stuff.
I decided to front load the Cherry Coke in order to get the usual caffeine from my coffee while also preventing myself from drinking soda well into the night.
Additionally, I'd decided to keep track of my weight each morning and night. Also for the calorie counts, the Cherry Coke totals are added to the total count at dinner since they were dispersed throughout the day.
Breakfast, Day 1: McDonald's Sausage, Egg, and Cheese McMuffin. Cherry Coke.
Breakfast Calories: 470
Monday AM Weight: 168.4 lbs
The cornerstone of the Buffett diet: Cherry Coke.
In 2015, Buffett told Fortune that he's "one-quarter Coca Cola."
Buffett said he favors either Diet Coke or Cherry Coke and has at least five cans of the soda a day.
I decided to opt for exclusively Cherry Coke throughout the week as I'm not the biggest fan of plain Coke taste. I am, however, a fan of cherry and cherry-adjacent soda products like Dr. Pepper and Cheerwine (it's a North Carolina thing, Google it).
I also couldn't purchase cans of the stuff at my local grocery store, but a two-liter works out to 5.6 cans a day, which is within the ballpark of Buffett's consumption. Thus, I decided to go with one of these each day.
If you're wondering, that works out to 262 grams, or 0.56 pounds, of sugar from the Cherry Coke alone per day. That's right, I got 84% of my recommended daily carbohydrate intake from just the sugar in the Coke.
I didn't do the math on the sugar content of the Coke, believing it was better to go into the week with a bit of blissful ignorance. While I assumed it would be rough consuming all of the syrupy sweet drink, I couldn't anticipate the full devastation the Coke would have on my mood.
