"Feels so weird to pretend nothing happened in this online world but feel like utter s--- in real life," Teigen wrote on Instagram.
She continued: "Going outside sucks and doesn't feel right, being at home alone with my mind makes my depressed head race. But I do know that however I'm handling this now isn't the right answer. I feel lost and need to find my place again, I need to snap out of this, I desperately wanna communicate with you guys instead of pretending everything is okay."
A post shared by chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen)
Here's the rest of her lengthy caption:
"I'm not used to any other way!! Cancel club is a fascinating thing and I have learned a whollllle lot. Only a few understand it and it's impossible to know til you're in it. And it's hard to talk about it in that sense because obviously you sound whiney when you've clearly done something wrong. It just sucks. There is no winning. But there never is here anyhow. All I know is I love you guys, I miss you guys, and I just needed an honest moment with you because I'm just ... tired of being sick with myself all day. I don't even know if it's good to say any of this because it's gonna get brutally picked apart but I dunno. I can't do this silent s--- anymore! If you or someone you know has also been cancelled please let me know if there is a cancel club reunion because I could use some time off my couch! Thank u and goodbye I love u."
Advertisement
Teigen received outpouring support from her followers on Instagram.
"I remember meeting you and thinking after I left, how you are the most incredible open, warm and honest person," the most-liked comment, written by Josh Smith, says. "You continue to be that same great person and have given so much and helped so many with your honesty feel less alone. You deserve so much love back now, so sending you the biggest hug."
Even Paris Hilton replied to Teigen's Instagram post, writing "Sending lots of love beauty" alongside heart emojis.
Teigen quit Twitter in March, but then returned to the app several weeks later. She didn't post this latest update on Twitter, but that didn't stop her message from receiving criticism on that platform.
"Chrissy Teigen's latest ig post shows how toxic it is to thrive off validation from peopls [sic] on social media," one person wrote.
"This whole story really speaks to how we don't yet have the proper language or cultural understanding to speak about social media as the addictive, mind-altering product that it actually is," they wrote.
NewsletterSIMPLY PUT - where we join the dots to inform and inspire you. Sign up for a weekly brief collating many news items into one untangled thought delivered straight to your mailbox.