"This is my Boyfriend's Valentines gift. It would be amazing if you could play "AFRICA" by Toto when you deliver the donuts," someone requested. "You don't have to play the whole thing, really just the chorus."
"WE LIKE OUR FOOD EXTREMELY SPICY," one bold diner said. "Got a $20 dollar tip for everyone if you make the spaghetti and lasagna spicy as SHIT and say it when you deliver the food. You know, so I know it's real thanks guys."
"People can change for the better, you know," one eater philosophized.
"Case in point: when I first moved to SF, years ago, my then-girlfriend and her hippie parents tried to introduce me to this wonderful West Coast craze called "acai bowls." I thought they all were crazy and then blamed the acai for "a very long bathroom break" that followed. They laughed, good-naturedly I'm sure, at the stupid (but well-intentioned) boy from Philadelphia. Funny how times change and everything comes around. Now that ex-girlfriend lives in Philadelphia with a truly stupid boy, I'm sure, and me, Instead of dating, I just need acai bowls to be happy. Is that what Alanis Morissette meant by ironic?"
"I just want water, I'm not messing with the Pop lately," one thirsty customer said, "Trying to change the way I eat. The body is your temple right? Anyway can I get water instead of pop?"
Rather than go to the grocery store for sandwich supplies, one customer ordered a deconstructed sandwich.
"Please send all sandwich parts separately," the requester said. "I will put together myself."
"BEANS HAVE TO BE REFRIED BEANS BLENDED SMOOTH WITH CHEESE ON TOP," this eater declared.
"Bacon extra extra extra crispy," requested one customer. "if you try to bend the bacon and it breaks then it is perfect! Just short of burned is another good way to describe it. Thank you in advance for your attention to detail regarding the cooking of the bacon. It is the most important part of the meal, so please take the request seriously!"
"Please let the protein gods bestow my platter with as much meat as possible," one hungry eater requested. "Heaps and heaps like the mountains of the Himalayas. And through the valleys and streams, an extra scoop of rice -- to nurture the young landscape. Ok, I'll keep it straight. I need as much meat and rice on this plate as possible."
"Can I have milk and tons of caramel at the bottom of the iced coffee and whipped cream and tons of caramel on top?," asked someone craving a sweeter drink.
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