I'll be getting my $1,200 stimulus check soon, and I know exactly what to spend it on: therapy

I'll be getting my $1,200 stimulus check soon, and I know exactly what to spend it on: therapy
The author is not pictured.mixetto/Getty Images
  • When I found out I'd be receiving a $1,200 stimulus check, I knew exactly what I'd spend it on: therapy.
  • My anxiety has been so high since the start of the pandemic — I bark orders at my husband to wash his hands, wear a mask, and more, and I need some help getting through this time.
  • I also have a lot of questions about the future. How do I say yes to invitations again? How do I carry this grief? I think therapy is the best investment I can make.
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"The government is sending $1,200 to everyone," I say to my husband. "Not everyone," he says.

"Will we get it?" I ask. "Yes, we file jointly as a married couple, and we make less than $150,000. We will both get a check," he says. "I know what I am doing with mine," I say. "I am getting counseling."

My husband and I have lost a portion of our income during the stay-at-home orders, but luckily we kept enough of it to cover our monthly expenses. We are some of the lucky few who can decide what to do with our stimulus checks.

We know many people have to use it to dig their way out of the total loss of their income. Many others will need to use it to try and catch up on rent or car payments, or to put groceries on the table.

Our stimulus checks haven't even hit our bank account yet, and already I've signed up for counseling with an online service. Getting therapy is the best use of that money that I could imagine.


The coronavirus has sent my anxiety into overdrive

I have never gone so long worrying about my husband every time he touches his face, takes out the trash, goes to the garage in our condo to sort the recycling. Every time he leaves the safe bubble of our little condo, I prepare myself with Clorox wipes to wipe down the doorknobs, his keys, and anything he touches before washing his hands.

I am like a drill sergeant barking orders, "Don't touch that! Wash your hands for 20 seconds! Leave your mask on until your hands are clean! Take off your shoes!" He knows I am highly anxious, and he responds to all of my commands, but he looks exhausted.

I need someone to walk me through the changes we are experiencing. I need someone to help me replace some of the fear and anxiety I feel with calm and acceptance. This situation is new. I can't Google the best way to handle a pandemic. And although the market is wide open for it, I haven't seen any self-help books on how to adjust or thrive during the biggest disruption of our lifetimes.

I need some help looking ahead and managing my fears about the future

And it isn't only what we are going through now. It is also about all that is coming. How do I adjust my fear when my husband goes back to his office? How do I accept brunch or dinner invitations at restaurants with friends? How do I resume my afternoon coffee break with my neighbor? Will I ever love and trust grocery shopping again? Will getting the mail ever be something that I look forward to instead of avoiding?

The virus has brought with it so many questions. How do I carry the grief? I have lost people I know. People I love have lost their parents. Family members have loved ones who are sick. There is no way to visit the sick or dying. My childhood friend's mother died alone without the touch or comfort of her children. It is so much to process and work through, and we aren't alone. We need to comfort those in our inner circle who are also struggling with their own grief, stress, loss of income, etc.


From the beginning of this pandemic, we have had to rely on people. We have taken our cues from scientists, cheered their research efforts toward a cure or vaccination. We have honored and tried to take care of our doctors, nurses, paramedics, grocery clerks, drivers, trash collectors, and all those people who are making a significant contribution to all of our lives. We have even had to count on our neighbors to stay home, to wear masks, to protect each other.

It is no surprise that with my stimulus money, I am once again turning to a human being to help me get through the most challenging and swiftly changing time of my life. I'm hoping to learn coping mechanisms for now and into the future. The money will be well spent.

Read the original article on Business Insider